Excitement!

Most often I am questioned by people for being always excited or being very impatient. Overtime, probably the PhD, helped me mellow down my impatience to some extent but one thing I have realized is I can't take out excitement from my life. 

How do you define this excitement in life? Some say adventure sports, for some it's traveling, maybe cooking, maybe playing and several other things. So, how does excitement feel like? It's not just being happy, it gives you a kick, pushes you towards something. Say for example, excitement about watching a movie. You are pepped up, anticipating a particular genre.. but mind you, you are not just happy, it's more. And when you finally see the movie and it meets your expectations, you feel the goal achieved or you are satisfied and happy.

What does this have to do with my example and my excitement? 

Well in life, we generally set a few major goals. Those goals take time and may or may not be achieved. Here also we have that excitement, you are pepped up, anticipating something and in the end you will either end up satisfied and happy or sad and dejected. 

Instead of setting long term goals, making a goal daily looks more feasible and the results are early. That's why, I try to find that excitement even while doing the daily chores, or while doing extra tasks like helping my son with the school project. It actually soothes me and helps me get the mental satisfaction and happiness. Sometimes when it starts to get boring, I try something new say for example baking a cake or painting. But, the excitement should be there atleast 80% of the time, else life that should be lived, becomes routine instead... just my thoughts, what's yours?

(Additional information: Even my students have given feedback saying that Ma'am is very excited to teach in class.. I think she should cool down ) 

Gratitude in small hands

Today, my son told me he is grateful for the things I do for him. He said we should all be grateful. The first thought I had was, he was a small kid, probably when we were small we all might have passed through similar experiences. Like when I got my first table clock from my father, or my first cycle, I used to be so happy. But maybe over time, we take things for granted, we forget to thank and think of it as just another thing he does, or somebody else does. While, such things were going through my mind, my son, without having his lunch, came and sat on my lap. He told me, "Mama, I want to tell you a story..

There was a small girl who wanted beautiful red colour shoes. She was staying with her mother, because her father had become a star. The mother was sick. But, she didn't care. All she wanted was her red shoes. After lot of difficulties her mother bought her the red shoes, but because she was sick, she also became a star. All she had with her was her red shoes" 

Then, he hugged me tight and started crying. "I am thankful for whatever you bring for me Mama." It was difficult for me to tackle the overwhelming emotions he had. I just told him thank you and changed the subject. But, I thought, such a small child and how beautifully he conveyed the message that we should have gratitude for whatever we have. I just hope when he grows up, he doesn't take things for granted but with gratitude

An unexpected call

How would you react when someone reaches out to you after 7 years and tells you that you are an inspiration for her. This someone who is very chic, smart, with a sharp sense of dressing, excellent in studies whom I used to be awe of when I was doing my PhD. My general tendency towards these brilliant people is to just stay away and maybe stalk their pics on social media. I mean how can me, a fat, shabbily dressed, introvert even dare to speak to someone far above my league. So, maybe we might have spoken once or twice in around 3 or 4 years that we overlapped. 

But, as I told earlier, I follow her on facebook and instagram. This year started quite dull for me, so I was sort of prepared mentally that I should take one day at a time. Suddenly she pings, says she wants to discuss something with me if I have time. Of course, I have time for people like her or Amitabh Bacchan if they call me. So, I was like, "yes we can talk right now!"

She spoke to me for whole 20 minutes discussing some general things, reminiscing PhD days and then she said she used to look up to me. They used to discuss about my addiction to time and how one can easily predict where to find me during a particular time of the day! I sheepishly replied, "yes my friends used to tease me saying you should work in a bank". And then she said, "yet you used to get things done within that period, your presentations and all!. We always used to wonder how you did it!" She also told me that how was I so strong to manage the first 7 months of pregnancy alone! You are so inspiring and that's why I thought to call you and know your thoughts. Of course, we spoke several other things, but well, this was an unexpected moment for my rather melancholic life.

Towards the end when I opened up about my apprehensions towards taking some decisions in life, she told me "whatever it is in life that you wanted to do, you shouldn't doubt yourself, because I can definitely tell you that can" 

It's not the first time that people have assured me when I have self-doubt and I have a feeling this might not be the last. This one unexpected call I shall always cherish